Bargin Books, Games, Music, Movies & More

Friday, January 29, 2010

I Like Hugs

It's wonderous what a hug can do,
A hug can cheer you when you're blue.
A hug can say, "I love you so" . . .
Or, "I hate to see you go".

A hug is "Welcome back again!"
And "Great to see you!" or "Where've you been?"
A hug can soothe a small child's pain,
And bring a rainbow after rain.

The hug! There's just no doubt about it,
We scarcely could survive without it.
A hug delights and warms and charms,
It must be why God gave us arms.

Hugs are great for fathers and mothers,
Sweet for sisters, even for brothers.
And chances are, some favourite aunts,
Love them more then potted plants.

Kittens crave them, Puppies love them,
Heads of state are not above them.
A hug can break the language barrier,
And make the dullest day seem merrier.

No need to fret about the store of 'em,
The more you give, the more there are of 'em.
So stretch those arms without delay,
And give someone a hug today!

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

The Seven Wonders Of The World


Tattoos = ?

The other morning I picked up the newspaper.  Of course, the devastation in Haiti was obviously dominating the media.  But as I continued to read I found a small article about tattoos and, according to the person who wrote it, they are suited to thugs and criminals who have a low to none education.

As someone with a couple of tattoos, I found the article rather appalling.  I work in a bank, I have a decent education and, let's be honest, do I look like a thug?

Take my brother for example.  The man is a highly respected defence attorney and is covered in tattoos.  He has a large gargoyle on his back, his children's names on his bicep as well as a few others.  That doesn't make him any less intelligent nor does it symbolize that he will turn into a criminal.

I guess this article proves one thing; we live in such a narrow minded world that a person who chooses to be different (whether it be in clothes, tattoos, piercings or hair colour) is criticized and ostracized.  Don't be afraid to be different and please, let me know what you think of the article mentioned above.  I'm already penning a reply to the editor and it would be nice to have other people's opinions.

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Brown Eyes

It's something found deep inside
It's the reason why I am alive
And the reason why I still reach for the sky

But everytime you walk on by
It always makes me cry
'Cause I'm such a sucker for brown eyes


Everyday you pass me
In the halls of our high school

I'm the girl you never see
And I know I'm such a fool
For falling for you

I'm just another victim of your sexuality
I should know that you're no good for me
But there's something about you
When you're around, I don't know what to do

It's something found deep inside
It's the reason why I am alive
And the reason I still reach for the sky

But everytime you walk on by
It always makes me cry
'Cause I'm such a sucker for brown eyes


Why can't I be with you
Why am I so shy
Why is it so hard
To swollow my pride
I'm just crying for you

I'm just another victim of your sexuality
I should know that you're no good for me

But there's something about you
When you're around, I don't know what to do


It's something found deep inside
It's the reason why I am alive
And the reason I still reach for the sky
But everytime you walk on by
It always makes me cry
'Cause I'm such a sucker for brown eyes

I dream about you everynight
I know that it sound crazy
But the fact of the matter is
I long for you, baby

I'm asking for one chance
To give my love to you
'Cause no one on this Earth
Loves you like I do
Like I do

I'm just another victim of your sexuality
I should know that you're no good for me
But there's something about you
When you're around, I don't know what to do

It's something found deep inside
It's the reason why I am alive
And the reason I still reach for the sky
But everytime you walk on by
It always makes me cry
'Cause I'm such a sucker for brown eyes

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

The Reason Why One Shouldn't Own A Cookoo Clock

Why females should avoid a girls night out after they are married!
The other night I was invited out for a night with "the girls." I told my husband that I would be home by midnight, "I promise!"

Well, the hours passed and the margaritas went down way too easy. Around 3 a.m., a bit loaded, I headed for home. Just as I got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hall started up and cuckooed 3 times.  Quickly, realising my husband would probably wake up, I cuckooed another 9 times. I was really proud of myself for coming up with such a quick-witted solution, in order to escape a possible conflict with him.  (Even when totally smashed...3 cuckoos plus 9 cuckoos totals 12 cuckoos = MIDNIGHT!)

The next morning my husband asked me what time I got in, and I told him "Midnight". He didn't seem pissed off at all. Whew! Got away with that one!


Then he said, "We need a new cuckoo clock." When I asked him why?, he said, "Well, last night our clock cuckooed three times, then said, "Oh shit." cuckooed 4 more times, cleared it's throat, cuckooed another 3 times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, and then tripped over the coffee table and farted."

That's When The Fight Started

My wife and I were watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in bed.


I turned to her and said, "Do you want to have sex?" "No," she answered.


I then said, "Is that your final answer?" She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying "Yes."


So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend."


And that's when the fight started....
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary?"


It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation.


"Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said.


So I suggested, "How about the kitchen?"


And that's when the fight started....

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, grabbed the dog, and slipped quietly into the garage.


I hooked up the boat up to the truck, and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour.


The wind was blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all day.


I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed.


I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered,


'The weather out there is terrible.'


My loving wife of 10 years replied, 'Can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?'


And then the fight started ...
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


A woman was standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror.


She was not happy with what she saw and said to her husband,


'I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.'


The husband replies, 'Your eyesight's damn near perfect.'


And then the fight started......
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first.


"I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please."


He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?""


Nah, she can order for herself."


And then the fight started...
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping channels.


She asked, 'What's on TV?'


I said, 'Dust.'


And then the fight started...

New Drafting Direction

Drafting Guys over 60----this is funny & obviously written by a Former Soldier-

New Direction for any war: Send Service Vets over 60!


I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track down terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to join the military. They've got the whole thing ass-backwards. Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 35.


For starters: Researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds. Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy.

Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm tired and hungry' We are impatient and maybe letting us kill some asshole that desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for a while.


An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10 a.m. Old guys always get up early to pee so what the hell. Besides, like I said, 'I'm tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical SOB......


If captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real stretch..


Boot camp would be easier for old guys. We're used to getting screamed and yelled at and we're used to soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming and yelling.


They could lighten up on the obstacle course however. I've been in combat and didn't see a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any pushups after completing basic training.


Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too. I've never seen anyone outrun a bullet.


An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to shave, to start up a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head.


These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm's way.


Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists.. The last thing an enemy would want to see is a couple of million pissed off old farts with attitudes and automatic weapons who know that their best years are already behind them.


***How about recruiting Women over 50 ......with PMS !!! You think Men have attitudes !!! Ohhhhhhhhhhhh my Lord!!! If nothing else, put them on border patrol....we will have it secured the first night!