How True Is This

FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO HAVE PETS, THIS IS A TRUE STORY.
FOR THOSE THAT DON'T....IT IS A TRUE STORY.
The following was found posted very low on a refrigerator door.


Dear Dogs and Cats: The dishes with the paw prints are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. Placing a paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.


The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Racing me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run.


I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort, however. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other, stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out on the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm.


For the last time, THERE IS NO SECRET EXIT FROM THE BATHROOM! If, by some miracle, I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge in an attempt to open the door. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years - canine/feline attendance is not required.


The proper order for kissing is: Kiss me first, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough.


Finally, in fairness, dear pets, I have posted the following message on the front door:


TO ALL NON-PET OWNERS WHO VISIT AND LIKE TO COMPLAIN ABOUT OUR PETS:


(1) They live here. You don't.


(2) If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. That's why they call it 'fur'-niture.


(3) I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.


(4) To you, they are animals. To me, they are adopted sons/daughters who are short, hairy, walk on all fours and don't speak clearly.


REMEMBER, DOGS AND CATS ARE BETTER THAN KIDS BECAUSE THEY:


(1) eat less,


(2) don't ask for money all the time,


(3) are easier to train,


(4) normally come when called,


(5) never ask to drive the car,


(6) don't smoke or drink,


(7) don't want to wear your clothes,


(8) don't have to buy the latest fashions,


(9) don't cost a gazillion dollars to educate and


(10)if they get pregnant, you can sell their children ....

A Better World For Us

There's a place we all know
There's a place we must go
To think things through
There is so much we can be
If we just stop and see
What we can do
To help win this fight
We'll show all of our might
Our journey has only begun
What I'm trying to say
Is that each and every day
Can still be fun

If we create a better world
For every boy and every girl
I know we can win
I have faith in all of you
And if everything you do
If we all join in
Roll the dice, take a chance
So we can all sing and dance
Oh yeah
If we all work together
Every day can be better
And we can create a better world for us

Pollution fills our lakes and rivers
And I still get the shivers
Whenever I see
Animals trying to adapt
To avoid mankinds traps
They want to be free
People will see every day
That we'll never turn away
From the problems at hand
Everything we read
Is about going green
Please try to understand

If we create a better world
For every boy and every girl
I know we can win
I have faith in all of you
And in everything you do
If we all join in
Roll the dice, take a chance
So we can all sing and dance
Oh yeah
If we all work together
Every day can be better
And we can create a better world for us

We stand side by side
Filled with hope and filled with pride
We're made for the future
So grab all of your friends
And start a brand new trend
One of pure adventure
This is the time to make things right
This is our final fight
To save Mother Earth
It seems that ignoance is breeding
While our world is bleeding
What's it all worth
Take a look at yourself
And try to spred your wealth
Amoung the poor
Start with something small
And if you hit a wall
Just open the door
Stare into a mirror
Know that we're getting nearer
To the end
It's all up to you
Now that this poem is through
We need to defend
Stand together as one
And know that we are strong
We are unstoppable
Everybody hold hands
Across the many lands
And know that peace is possible

If we create a better world
For every boy and every girl
I know we can win
I have faith in all of you
And in everything you do
If we all join in
Roll the dice, take a chance
So we can all sing and dance
Oh yeah
If we all work together
Every day will be better
And we can create a better world for us

I'll Be There

I'm sensing some hostility
That's directed at me
You're quick to defend my honor
Don't you know that I'm stronger
Don't you know that I want you
Please send me a sign


When you need a friend
Someone who's there 'til the end
Just know that I'll be there
Chillin' with me just for fun
Or when you want the 411
Just know that I'll be there


I hop in my car and go for a ride
You're the one by my side
All right, yeah
Tellin' me what's going on
Tellin' me right from wrong
Takin' me back where I belong
Again


When you need a friend
Someone who's there 'til the end
Just know that I'll be there
Chillin' with me just for fun
Or when you want the 411
Just know that I'll be there


I'm here to tell you
What's going down
Talk to me, babe
If you're around
'Cause I'll always be there
I'll be there


When you need a friend
Someone who's there 'til the end
Just know that I'll be there
Chillin' with me just for fun
Or when you want the 411
Just know that I'll be there

Naughty Girl

I've seen the world
With parted eyes
I've seen the real you
Though all your lies
But you're not the only one
Who's been out having some fun

I'm a naughty girl
Performing a peep show
Doing things
A girl shouldn't know
And I wanna know
How you found out
What I've been up to
What I'm all about

Gone are the days
Of my innocence
Now all I'm after
Is vengence
You hurt me when you left
But now I am tough
What I do is questionable
I like it real rough

I'm a naughty girl
Performing a peep show
Doing things
A girl shouldn't know
And I wanna know
How you found out
What I've been up to
What I'm all about

I'm Not In Love

I use to think
That dreams were just for fools
But now I know
That I was wrong to reject you
Seems like I'm caught in the middle
In a battle of emotions

I'm not in love
It's just a crush
All I need is time
A moment that is mine
While I'm waiting for you
I'm not in love

There is no need to resent me
It's time that I
Learned to live with my mistakes
This is not a rejection
But there is nothing that I need from you

I'm not in love
It's just a crush
All I need is time
A moment that is mine
While I'm waiting for you
I'm not in love

Feels like there's so much more
Between us
And you see it in my eyes
So why does this romance pass us by

I'm not in love
Don't tell me what to believe
It's just a crush
I'm trying hard to believe
All I need is time
A moment to call mine
While I'm waiting
I'm not in love
It's just a crush